Where is the normality and physiological birth?

We are taught in uni that labour and birth is normal, do not interfere and facilitate physiological processes as best as possible... Yet over the past two weeks on the labour ward I have seen very little if anything physiological. The place is heaving with intervention and medicalisation!

So much induction of labour, pushing of pethidine and epidurals (of course some of it was completely women's choice but I do not feel that midwives encourage and support women to use their bodies and avoid the meds) and complete reliance and over use of CTG's. I experienced a number of times where the phrase "Luckily you got the epidural just in time!" because when the VE was done post epidural the cervix was 8cm or even fully dilated. It just got a bee in my bonnet because the thought was in my head~ why did the midwife not engage with the women more and realise all her labours had been super quick and she actually wasn't completely gone on an epidural because she didn't like the idea of being stuck in a bed for 8 hours after baby was born? I found that out from a couple of minutes of chatting whereas the midwife was so stuck in the paper work. If she had given the time to talk to the woman, focus on her thoughts and support her through the contractions I really feel it could have been different.

I'm not blaming individual midwives. I do not feel that midwives are personally thinking they want this birth to be full of intervention. I guess it comes down to the system of birth that is in place in hospitals and the socialisation that occurs once a midwife is in that system. Yet it still irks me! Midwife= 'with woman' and yes physically the midwife is there with the woman but I feel emotionally and psychologically there is a complete lack of connection. These expectant mothers and their partners are coming into an unknown place for a very special time in their lives and are usually quite nervous and often confused yet they are being seen as just another load of necessary paperwork and another day at work...

What can we do as student midwives to change this trend? Or even affect in in an individual way?
Personally I try my best under the difficult circumstances to connect with the women and their partners, allow them the space to relax and speak their feelings. But it is difficult...especially when as a student you already feel at the bottom of the ladder. Last week I gave a woman the choice of sitting on the bed or out on the birthing ball, she chose the ball and found it very comfortable. Only problem was she had to be on the CTG... The midwife ended up getting annoyed as the CTG wasn't staying put without someone holding it and insisted the woman get into the bed. She was so uncomfortable there and I felt ridiculed for giving her a choice and causing the trouble! Regardless I will keep trying to be 'with woman' and I really hope I am part of a normal birth sometime soon!

What's your experience? What do you do to find the normality and bring it to life?

A week (24hrs) in theatre and a scary moment

Last night I finalling started 'My Birth Journal'. Something I mean to do since first year to record by experiences, thoughts and feelings from the course and especially the births I'm present for.

I'm going to type the first entry for you to read here...

'I was quite scared of the idea of going to theatre, the people down there all seemed scary, blunt and expecting nothing less than perfection... After a few people told me their experince had been good I relaxed a bit and glad I did. It really wasn't so bad!

Yes-it was lots of caesarean births, immediate cord clamping and factory like work (one midwife actually whispered to me "Yes, it is a bit like a factory down here but it has to be done") but the staff, for the most part, were friendly and nice. I supported and spoke to parents as much as I could and used a gentle touch with the brand new babies. I did my best to provide gentle, loving care whilst following strict theatre rules and social norms.

I learnt how to 'scrub in'~ a skill I hope to not have to use often, but it will help, especially whilst training and working in this grinding system.

I had the priveledge to meet new souls arriving into the world, I spoke and whispered kind words and let my hands calm them whilst they lay on the resusitare away from mothers heart.

I had a special few moments with one baby, Joe*, a big bouncing baby with lots of hair who's mamma was from Zimbabwe. As the mum was there by herself I brought Joe to meet her for their first few moments together outside of the womb. It was beautiful. Kisses were exchanged, gentle whispers of welcome were muttered as this baby was welcomed to his family. I was so happy to be present in that moment with mamma and baby as the rest of the world and operation bustled on.

Two sets of twins were born on my second day there, that was special. Although a scary moment did happen when I followed parents and babies to the recovery room. I was asked to bottle feed one, no problem. Except after 5 minutes suddenly the dear babies hands, feet and face went bluey/ grey and she stopped breathing... The mother said "Is she ok? Has she gone blue don't you think?" The bottom of my stomach dropped, that feeling of dread. I carried her quickly across the room to the midwife, trying to reassure myself and the parents in the process. A few moments with the midwife and she came back to pink. O2 sats monitor on and off I go to feed her only for it to happen again! Sats down to 84% and ashey colour... Midwife brought her to oxygen as I sat trying to reassure parents whilst I don't know what's happening... (After a whiff of oxygen she pinked right up immediately). Paeds came, fed her no problem~ of course I was so thankful, but felt a bit stupid as well as relieved!

Overall, I feel more prepared for if a woman I'm with on the labour ward/ in labour anywhere needed to go to theatre and also I can appreciate more what going through a caesarean birth is like.'

So that's a brief summary of my theatre experience. I would love to hear yours~how did you find it? Was it as you expected? What did you take away from it?

*Name changed

Homebirth conference and meeting Ina May

Yesterday was the Homebirth Association of Ireland's conference in Dublin and I am very glad I attended. Me and friends drove up early in the morning full of excitement to meet Ina May Gaskin who was to be the keynote speaker of the conference! I would love to tell you about it minute for minute, but I don't have the time so will give a quick overview instead :)

There were a number of people speaking including the wonderful women who organise and run the HBA Ireland (now in it's thirtieth year), parents who had given birth at home and of course Ina May Gaskin. A panel was held to discuss homebirth in Ireland including a variety of women involved in birth (a midwife involved in the set up of a DOMINO scheme in Ireland, another who is involved in AIMS Ireland, a homebirth midwife and new mother, a 4th year student midwife, a midwife involved in Community Midwives Association of Ireland and finally Marie O'Connor who wrote Birth Tides-a book based on a homebirth study in Ireland in 1992). Question and answer sessions brought up some fantastic topics such as VBAC's and HBAC's, why hospitals and hospital midwives are often so unsupportive of homebirth, student midwives gaining experience in homebirth and the 'rules' that disqualify women from the option of homebirth.

How fantastic it was to meet Ina May, such an inspiration to me!  Her talks were very interesting and wonderful, she is someone who is great to listen to in person. She spoke about the Sphincter law, shoulder dystocia and the development of the 'Gaskin Manouver', the Farm in Tennessee, historical and other current birth figures around the world, cesarean births, sheela-na-gigs and many other birth-y things :) Sheela-na-gig is a fertility figure that appeared carved over many early Christian churches, especially in Ireland. Ina May described how we can learn from these for supporting birthing women- a calm, smiling, relaxed face with no wrinkles or lines is linked with less tearing. As you can see from this picture the sheela-na-gig's face is smiling and calm and her vagina is opening wide.

 A sheela-na-gig

 One of the other student midwives I went along with went up to Ina May during a break and started chatting to her and of course pulled us over too so we all got to have a little chat with her by ourselves, that was pretty cool! She asked us about our first birth experiences and commented on how lucky we were that they were minimally traumatic. She really understood how student midwives get traumatised and shocked by what we can experience. A piece of advice from Ina May: Write a journal of your experiences and births, write down your thoughts, intuitions and feelings about the experiences you have had into it. She says this because when you have a run of bad days or are feeling fed up with it...you can forget the good times and why you're following this path, by writing a journal you can remind yourself and re-motivate. At the end of the conference I bought her newest book, Midwife Matters- A Midwife's Manifesta and she signed it for me, also snapped a photo of us together! (photo is not the best, but this was my 33rd hour without sleep...)

 Me and Ina May with my signed books :)

Also due the fantastic-ness of my outgoing student midwife friend we got tips from a lactation consultant for our upcoming breastfeeding exam (and of course for the rest of our careers!). She was a wonderful woman who had breastfed her own four children and really encouraged biological breastfeeding (mother comfortable in best position for her and baby on mummys tummy), especially when struggling with breastfeeding.

Overall, a fantastic day without a doubt. I learnt so much and felt so happy to be there, as my friend pointed out-when we were there we felt 'normal' because everyone was so passionate about birth, homebirth, mothers and their babies. It was wonderful, I would really encourage you to get to as many birth events as you can and if possible meet Ina May!

A long overdue update and some exciting news!

I was reminded the other day that I need to update my blog, so true! Thought I'd give you a little idea of what I'm up to and how the course is going (and I hope to keep updating more regularly over the summer...ho dee hum).

Right now I have a few things going on, mainly the fact that I *should* be studying for my exams starting next week. This year has the most exams, we have 5 but seen as 3 of them are split into two subjects it feels like studying for 8! I particularly have an issue with pharmacology as the way it is set up in Ireland is that we study with the general nurses meaning we are learning drugs used for Parkinsons and heart disease, ones you very rarely come across when treating healthy pregnant women, grr..

Second thing on my plate, I offered and was accepted to do a presentation for the Virtual International Day of the Midwife on the 5th of May. I am very excited, but it's making me rather nervous now the thought of speaking to so many people. I will be speaking about the experience of being a student midwife with particular concern on the support we do or do not receive, I'm hoping there will be lots to discuss and I won't be the only one speaking for the hour! ope you make it along to some (or all as I hope to!) of the presentations. Check out the line-up on their website, there are some fantastic looking speakers.

And perhaps the most exciting...I'm going to hear Ina May Gaskin speak tomorrow! Ina May is, let's say, one of my idols!! My mum read her 'Spiritual Midwifery' when she was pregnant with me and then gave me a copy for my 17th birthday, if you haven't read it I would really recommend you do. There are some really amazing birth stories and Ina May's information for midwives. I'm bringing my copy with me tomorrow in the hope I may be able to get it signed. She will be the keynote speaker at the Homebirth Association of Ireland conference in Dublin. It's my first time going to one of their events and I'm really looking forward to it even if it is a day out of my study (maybe I can use the excuse that it is studying...?!).

Anyone else studying for exams? Have exciting midwifery related events going on in their lives? Love to hear from you!

Right, I'd better be back to some work now...